No Ring, No Bring.

Last week, I heard on some cheesy daytime show that Pippa Middleton (or whatever her married name is now) was enforcing a "no ring, no bring" policy for her wedding guest list: no "plus ones" for friends and loved ones unless they were married or engaged.

Pippa Middleton Gets Married

I suppose this is a good way to keep a wedding guest list under control—for Pippa. For one thing, I'm sure plenty of well-wishers were very interested in attending her wedding, and for another I'm not up on my British royalty-adjacent wedding etiquette. But is this a good strategy for the more common American bride?

This American bride isn't into it. I feel that a wedding is about celebrating a couple, and therefore it is meant to be enjoyed by couples. Sure, single people can enjoy weddings, too. I mean, I haven't enjoyed a wedding as a single person, but it can probably be done. But I digress...

Bored Girl at a Wedding

Now, I can't speak to being married yet, but there are certain things that "magically" change when you get engaged: you can call your partner "fiancé", you can try fancy food and cake for free, and you can get mad kudos at Disney World. However, your relationship does not all of a sudden become a completely different, vastly more important thing. Especially when you've been together a long time.

Rob (aka my other half) and I were together for almost eight years before we got engaged: long enough that a DJ we met with said getting married would be "just a formality" for us at this point (we didn't choose that company). If, after living with Rob for years without being engaged, I'd received a wedding invitation addressed only to me, I would probably have chosen not to attend. I would have felt that was disrespectful of my relationship, and a cute rhyme wouldn't change that.

So if anyone advises you to go, "No Ring, No Bring"—especially coupled with the phrase, "You do you!" (a telltale signal of bad wedding advice)—think carefully. Is it worth excluding Uncle Barry's girlfriend so Fourth Cousin Millie Twice-Removed can get an invitation? Should your college roommate's boyfriend of two years get the axe because you've only met him once?

Obviously, I cannot make these decisions for you. Just don't be surprised if, like me, some would-be wedding guests aren't keen on attending your nuptials without their ringless-yet-significant others.